wormhole detected

Thanks to a postal wormhole opening up between Washington, D.C., USA, and Meenambalpuram, India, I am currently getting up to speed on how Ricki Lake went from a size 22 to a size 4 without surgery as well as getting an up close look at Paris's jail cell. It's incredible but I am reading the CURRENT issue of gold-standard US Weekly magazine, courtesy of my idenitical twin. It only took 5 days for it to get to my house! Whatever happened to those days back in 1999 when we would wait months for packages or letters, only for them to never arrive, or if we were lucky, stripped, crushed, or destroyed? Whatever hapened to the letter that would saunter in after 3 months in some postal purgatory, with the whole envelope and contents missing except for a scrap of charred paper bearing the address? Oh those were the days! Back when it took 30 minutes to open an email at the one internet cafe in town and phoning home was an expensive and frustrating joke. Now I sit in the middle of nowhere Meenambalpuram, blogging with high speed internet. If I want to call the U.S., or even (literally) the middle of the Amazon jungle, I use Skype and 9 times out of 10 I have an excellent connection. Ahhh, the miracles of developments in telecommunications. The only downside seems to be that snail mail starts to lose its luster. Except when that snail mail contains US Weekly magazine!!! Thanks, identical twin!