taking the guesswork out of marriage

A couple of months back the Dinamalar (Tamil daily) ran an article "The girl who is going to live in her husband's house...", roughly translated. Incidentally this is also a very popular song that is played at weddings. It really takes the guesswork out of being a wife and daughter-in-law. I thought it might be helpful for those of you women who are thinking about getting married, are recently married, or have been married for a long time and want to try a new approach to things. Also for husbands, you might want to print this out and give it to your wife. Once you finish reading please vote as to whether or not you think these were written by a man or a woman. Unfortunately there is no byline!

"...It's really up to you whether your life is going to be sad or sweet. Housewives, this is for you...

• Always think that your life is good; don't allow other thoughts to grow, or else your peace of mind will be shattered.
  
• Set aside a time for husband and wife to talk.
• Always move about with a smiling face.
• When fighting with your husband, don't use bad words. Think before you speak.
• If you give respect to each him, problems won't present themselves.
• Always be modest. If you don't have an ego, you will be able to be more close to one another.
• Don't be always calling your mother and complaining about your problems at home. This is for your mother's own good.
• Before you get married, try to get to know things about him. Get to know about his likes and dislikes.
• Thinking you are going to make jokes, don't compare his character with that of his relations.
• If you husband is yelling at you, be completely silent and don't give a response. After a minute of silence, tell your opinion very calmly.
  
• While in your husband's house, don't always be boasting about your parents and relations.
  
• Don't leave the house without your husband's company or permission.
• Don't be self-willed and make a decision on any issue without consulting your husband first.
  
• Don't ever compare others to your husband, saying they are better than him.
• Be hospitable and gracious to your husbands' relations when they come to visit.
• Don't always be nagging, "I want this, I want that."
• If you husband gives you some money for house expenses, be very thrifty with it. When he is having a difficult time with money, give him the money you saved aside and shock him.
• On his birthday give him a gift and make him happy.
• The moment your husband comes home from the office, don't start up complaining about the household problems. Immediately give him his coffee and tiffin (dinner).
  

Tips for how to interact with your mother-in-law will be added tomorrow.